The Wolf of Wall Street 7/10

Let’s not beat around the ‘oh-so-obvious’ bush here and begin by addressing the fact that this film is a whopping 3 hours long! Yes I mean 180 mins, 10800 seconds, 2 whole football games, 1/8 of a day, a return flight to Paris…

If you can get past this rather off-putting point, please continue to read on…


The story follows Jordan Belfort (Leonardo DiCaprio)  a young naïve, newlywed with aspirations of being a Wall Street stockbroker, through his troublesome path to obscene wealth and drug addiction. There’s a charade of drug abuse, violence and butt-naked femalesthroughout the 3 hours (did I mention how long it was?) if that’s your sort of thing, run to the nearest cinema NOW. It will be the best film you’ve ever seen, genuinely.

For those who require more than a host of shaven genitals and powder snorting to awaken their entertainment juices… you will enjoy it, but I doubt you’ll want to see it again.

Leo Di undoubtedly delivers an outstanding performance, true to form. Similar to his portrayal of Gatsby, he is the suave, charming gentleman penned by many-a-noted writer. Matthew McConaughey gives an equally memorable performance (though his appearance is minor) with what I would regard one of the most memorable scenes in a restaurant on Wall Street (you’ll find yourself humming and beating your chest for a week afterwards).

There are plenty of laughs (not surprisingly supplied by Jonah Hill) and some extreme highs and lows. Leo’s speeches addressing his employees are Braveheart-esque, so much so that you find yourself wanting to fight for Belfort, party with Belfort and for the most part… be Belfort.

I’m finding it difficult to put across anything bad to you, and that’s because it wasn’t bad, there was just something… missing. (Don’t shoot me for the cliché). It could be this preceded hype that is continually putting films on a pedestal for the likes of me to swipe it from beneath their feet and beat their credentials to a lifeless pulp.

I’m not going to do that to this film, because I honestly didn’t dislike it. Maybe it was just my numb backside distracting my thoughts, but I switched off. Do this film in two sittings, and I reckon you’d be onto a winner. You will definitely want to work for Stratton Oakmont, Inc. if Carlsberg did workplaces…